A Techno Fairy Tale
Our computers have become like our sacred familiars in these modern times, and they can act as oracles and allies if we court them
Once upon a website
You don’t usually get many fairy tales that start like that. But technology is the wicked witch in the wood for me, or the antisocial troll under the bridge. I am generally quite a calm person who does not get beastly angry easily. Unless I’m near a computer, and then I melt down and rage frequently. Computers and technology always seem to be cackling at me from behind a cauldron of codes, and crashing when I haven’t pressed save, kidnapping important emails, and generally taunting me.
Our computers and phones are much like our witch familiars at this point, rather than black cats or toads, delivering our oracles out into the world and receiving knowledge back to stir into the pot, and most importantly, weaving themselves into our energy bodies and our daily lives.
Like many of you, I feel very concerned by the rise of artificial intelligence, and prefer to plant my roots in bio-intelligence. But like it or not tech is here, and we have to define our relationship to it, and it to us. We must understand that tech is also part of the quantum universe, and fashioned from the clay of the earth (crystal microchips) that also made our bodies. Tech is also a child of the mother, much like the old gnostic tales of the archons.
We have to define our relationship to these tech creatures, and enliven it with magic and sacred intention and reciprocity, rather than just let it languish in unconsciousness or in the realms of taboo, where all our other daily powers are hidden and forbidden, and forgotten.
Or worse yet, allow our tech familiars to become ensnared by the Silicon valley ‘Ring of Power’.
Shall we abandon this potential energy to others? Or initiate our own feminine tech magic?
Web of Wonders
So, I wanted to tell you that I’m in the middle of having a new website designed. It’s gone fairly smoothly so far, although it’s taken a few years of brewing, stewing and stirring to even get it this far. I’m feeling happy with the way it’s going, but it got me thinking about tech magic.
Despite my frequent horror at tech, I am also quite adept at tech magic. Technology is one of the easiest ways that spirit world can communicate with us, and I often use my computer and all its facilities and functions as an oracle, so that those magical messages can be delivered.
I have had my computer deliver messages from dead people, bring up photos randomly of people or even yoga kriyas, and once my computer inserted a screen saver of Mary Magdalene. Sometimes I put my iTunes on shuffle and the titles of the first 3 songs that come up from the quantum soup of my music library spell out a very precise and timely message of guidance.
Social media is the same, full of tech magic potentials; once, as a I was weeping and grieving for a friend that had recently died, who was a brilliant flamenco guitarist, I received a friend request from a Spanish flamenco guitarist who looked identical to my friend, and played the same style of music. They could have been twins. As I was crying and laughing and listening to the flamenco guitar, another friend request from a Spanish flamenco guitarist popped in. I knew that my friend was using tech magic to communicate with me from the other side.
Tech magic is a huge part of feminine manifestation, because tech as it shows up in our lives is all about community, communication and connecting. Tech is a part of feminine magic.
I sometimes get anonymous emails that are direct email messages from the universe to me! When you practice tech magic you get on the subscriber list to Otherworld, and to “God”.
No one talks about the magic and quantum possibility that tech brings into our lives, because like a lot of feminine magic, we’ve been taught that someone else owns or controls it. Not true.
Tech is based on awen – a mysterious energy that travels through networks of connection. It belongs to us, and as feminine magicians, we are high mistresses of the alchemy it can bring.
Back in 2000 at the first internet boom, I was part of a team putting on a huge live gig – one of the first of its kind – to see how the technology could hold up. Thousands logged on, including people from NASA and the Russian technology elites. I could sense a future magic coming.
It can also be a double-edged sword, because the tech gods can also be tricksters.
Once, after recording an ‘erotic’ meditation, the email account ‘accidentally’ and supernaturally sent it to a handful of strangers (to me) who had been Azra’s previous medical colleagues. We were only alerted when one politely emailed back to say thank you and that he’d enjoyed it immensely. Another time my father sent me a FB message on the year anniversary of his death. When my mum died she delivered a message to me through iTunes that floored me.
Sometimes the magic can be bigger than you could imagine. The tech norns are weaving. I share this story to reflect on how our deep soul journey and these computer beings we share our lives with, can be so entwined, and how even when it seems like things are falling apart, secretly a force is at work so much grander than we can imagine, that can ‘see’ our future.
When our computers fail, our websites crash, it means we are upgrading into a new future.
Our tech familiars are connected to our energy bodies, our magical quantum selves, and when we are upgrading or having a quantum leap, our phones, computers, sites often follow suit.
Back in early 2018 we realized we had to get a new website. The website we’d had was designed in 2013 just before the huge evolution in technology, especially related to online course delivery. We were told we had more plug-ins at the back end than was possible, and that whole thing would have to be redone. Deep breaths, oh you trying tech trickster gods.
But embracing the nature of rebirth, we enlisted a web designer with a great reputation and client list. I sketched out all the beautiful drafts of how I wanted it to look, spending afternoons researching how it would all come together as an amazing and elegant mystery school portal.
Yet, something was amiss. The web designer never actually designed anything. Even though we had given him quite a few thousands of dollars. After a few months, I drafted Azra in. He has a way with people. He’s a cat whisperer, and a person whisperer. I was frothing with rage, but Azra was calmly patient with this person and situation. He managed to get him on the phone.
After a decade long career as a website designer, suddenly after taking on our job, he had crumbled into serious emotional issues, and taken his family, and our money, and run off to Salt Lake City. “What???” I asked, incredulous after I heard the tale. “How can this happen?” He refused to do any work at all on our website, even though he had spent our money. In a move that truly deserved a prize for negotiation, Azra got him to agree to pay it back over one year.
That was great. But we still didn’t have a new website, nor the money to pay for one – as that would be drip fed to us month by month into 2019. By this time, I was in recovery from my fibroid surgery, and I could see that nothing was going as planned, and there was a message in this. I didn’t know what it was, but I knew there was a magical reason everything was blocked.
Fast forward to the Autumn of that year and as my mother was dying, the payment system crashed and Azra and our tech support spent every day doing hours of heroics just to keep things functioning smoothly for our last online course, which ran right after my mum died.
Erm, was the universe trying to tell me something? I am a little deaf, so it shouted louder.
The website was clearly ready for retirement, but valiantly (stubbornly) I continued, and we took the main website down and created a holding page that said the website was going to return all sparkly and new in the next year. Oh how the tech fairies giggled with other plans.
The website – now just a solitary page – was hijacked, and Azra had to speak to someone in Turkey to try and negotiate the safe return of our kidnapped domain. Money was demanded, very nicely. The man in charge of these negotiations was called Enkidu. I kid you not. We were immersed in the Magdalene book, and the history of Sumeria at the time, and now Enkidu was on the line. Enkidu was the wild guy in the Gilgamesh tale who the holy whore priestess tamed.
He’s the oldest literary representation of the ancient Sumerian wild man, who embodies the ‘wild and natural world’ (hello Biomancy), and is the equivalent of Pan or the Horned One.
Mr Enkidu also informed Azra that he was in fact Syrian, and that he spoke Aramaic as his first language – it’s one of the only places in the world where Aramaic as Jesus might of spoke it still exists, and is the oldest continuous spoken language still in existence. At that time, In the MM book, we had just written that Mary Magdalene is most likely of Syrian origin. So naturally, the conversation took a philosophical turn, and Mr Enkidu was very excited about Azra’s interest in Aramaic and knowledge about the subject, and the tech kidnap negotiations were sidelined.
We never got the website back. But some deep and strange magic was brewing....
It was not all that was brewing. We discovered that the kidnapped website domain had been taken over by some rogue coffee makers and now featured a steaming cup of coffee on the homepage. We were informed of this by our publisher who had been double checking our website as the book went into the final edits. We surrendered. The tech gods had won.
I remembered fondly when we had first bought the domain back in 2012. It was owned by a member of a conservative Christian church of the same name, who somehow agreed to sell it to us in a magic moment of tech spell casting. Now we were also being called to let it go too.
The Fountain of Life didn’t belong to the church, and it turned out, it didn’t belong to us. We set it free, so that it could It could go wild somewhere in a cyber space paradise Otherworld, frolicking with Enkidu, the original wild man who had become the consort of the Holy Whores.
We had just discovered I was pregnant too. There was not one hair on me that had any appetite for creating a new website now, so we made the revolutionary choice to not have any website.
In tech magic terms, this is like descending into the black hole, and sitting in the darkness.
“Take the whole website down” I said, with resignation. I was entering the Void. I was creating space, emptiness, one of the most crucial stages in feminine womb-centered magic. A Void is an emptiness that is pregnant with new possibilities. It gives us a space to grieve and birth.
Death and Rebirth
I can’t tell you what happened in the space between my mother dying on October 24th 2018 and my daughter being born on October 24th, 2019, both under Scorpio moons. I was in an altered reality, a strange, beautiful, grief filled and beauty filled place, where light was pouring from the darkness, new life being born through the black hole of grief that had enveloped me.
And this fresh new light did not want an old website from the old world. Something new was being born through me, and I just had to make the space for it. That was all I knew. I trusted.
In the middle of the pregnancy, at a juicy creative stage (in between the vomiting), I felt a new essence flowing through. I got my sketch pads out and beautiful vibrant gold and green lettering spelled itself out on the page, one day to emerge like a butterfly into Biomancy.
My own page would reflect the essence of who I was at my deepest core; an artist, an enchantress and a wordsmith, someone who crafts words into doors. This was a fairytale space of wonder and enchantment, soaked in my ancestral heritage. It felt like a gift to the daughter I was weaving into being. I wanted to write new stories of feminine magic that she would inherit.
It was as if this grief inside me, and this new life inside me, existing simultaneously, were drawing out my very deepest roots, and also weaving a completely new pattern into being.
A new voice was birthing through me – and it is still not landed, even now. There are strange worlds whirling around spiral galaxies inside me, weaving a new version of me into being.
And the funny thing is, it all started out over a bloody website.
Somehow all the frustration and road blocks, and sheer tragi-comedy of the tech shenanigans, was also a form of a wild magic, a part of a new braiding of my life; that I hadn’t been aware of. There is magic in your computers, and in the online spaces you create.
Never forget that. Magic is everywhere.
And the magic shapeshifts, as you evolve.
Looking back now, I see that tech magic has been part of my grief process.
And my rebirth.